Truly and without pause, I hate mornings.

Do you know what I hate more than mornings? HDH should know, as he DOES IT EVERY FREAKING MORNING!!

He wakes me up. Chattering away in the bathroom, trying to sit on my legs to get ready, babbling along about crap that matters not before 6:30 a.m. Because HDH is up early, everyone else must be, too.

This morning was no different.

6:15 a.m.
HDW: .................. sleeping away, after hitting the bed at 11, and knowing HDToddler won't be up until at least 8:30 a.m.

HDH: Hey, do you want to hear my impersonation of the American Idol judges?

HDW: No.

HDH: My coordinator thought it was funny yesterday.

HDW: So call her now. She might not think it's so funny at 6:15 a.m. Stop talking.

HDH: No, really. It's funny. You know, "Waddup Daaawg".

HDW: Stop talking or I swear when they ask me what your last words were, and I will tell them, "I don't know. He was gurgling a lot". Be quiet.

HDH: Okay, so this is Randy (proceeds to do this impersonation). And Paula ... and Simon.

HDW: (putting a pillow over my head and begging for death)

And because it takes me a hell of a long time to fall asleep in the first place, and a long time to get BACK to sleep once I am awakened by said-stupid-shit-babbling, I'm not a nice person to be around - even more than usual.

Reminds me of the song by the Ben Taylor Band:

But she don't like early in the morning, best to let her wake herself
If you can't respect her warning
You might wind up waking someone else

Don't worry, HDH. It's ON. You want to sleep in this weekend? Nope. I'm sending HDToddler in at oh-dark-thirty to jump on your head with the stinky diaper I didn't change.

Kid gloves OFF!!