If I Had a Boat
Never been to Red Rocks to see a concert?? YOU MUST! This is by far one of the most beautiful places on God's green Earth.
We hiked our asses up the 4,000 stairs, got ourselves a Hazed and Infused and found our seats.
Opening act was The Subdudes, and they rocked socks, baby. My favorite song was "Next To Me" ... just awesome.
Somewhere between their act and Lyle coming out, I stood in line at the bathroom for possibly an eternity. There were two girls taking WAY TOO LONG in there. What the fuck, man? Pee and GO. No primping. No caring. It's dark. You're outside. If we piss ourselves because you are standing in there going, "Like, ohmigod, your date is SO HOT!!!", then I would be forced to throw you over the ledge. One down, a few to go ...
Regardless, Lyle came out while I was peeing, so I missed that little bit - but whatever. He introduced his band bit by bit, did a lot of new and old song. The musicians were SO INCREDIBLE. It was by far the best live performance I have EVER seen. HDHusband said up until last night, his best live concerts were George Benson or the Police, but Lyle and his Big Band blew everyone else right out of the water.
And Francine Reed? She had just as much applause as Lyle, and appropriately so. When she sang, she blew the sky wide open. I kid you not. She did a song with the lines "I need some sugar in my bones" ... and if you know what song this is, lemme know. I cannot find it anywhere ... yet!
When I've told friends we went to see Lyle Lovett, they roll their eyes and say, "UGH!". You know, I realize he's an acquired taste. He doesn't appeal to everyone, and that's great - but if you ever get a chance, see him live. He's funny. He's witty. He's intelligent. He's a little goofy looking, but we all are to some degree, I think. You won't be disappointed.
With all of THAT said, it's important to note that sitting at Red Rocks and people watching is BY FAR the funniest thing in the world. I cannot properly describe the two couples sitting two rows in front of us.
Couple A: A guy that looked like Damone from Fast Times and his Clueless Wonder date.
Couple B: A guy who looked like he was a Carnie, and his date ... a woman with a white halter top (with a few random strings, and I mean, STRINGS) in the back - completely see through, all nip, and a pair of cut off jean shorts with her pudge hanging out the front. ACK.
I watched another woman sit next to Damone, and he immediately took out his phone and was taking some hot camera phone action. Meanwhile, Carnie was half-drunk, half-baked, half-something, and just looking over at his date, staring. Not even trying to conceal what he was doing, and it just cracked my ass UP.
At one point, Carnie got up to get a beer, and I said to HDH, "That guy is SUCH a sleazeball". A woman in front of me turned around to me, laughed, and said, "I didn't realize my inner voice could speak out loud!". Apparently, having a leftover cold means you talk a lot louder than you think you do. Oooops.
But he was really Skeevy.
Promise.
We stayed for every last song of the concert, and bolted to the parking lot, got out before the traffic got too bad. Home at midnight. Dying today, but with a few naps, we're all better.
I dropped my son off at the babysitter's, and within the ten minutes I was there, he'd been in time out's three times. Hmmm. Good day to not be around him, methinks.
