The microwave and oven are one piece, and to repair anything, the whole piece must be removed from the wall, and that whole thing is running about 4,000 dollars... but I'm getting a head of myself.

I was using the microwave one evening, and the door wouldn't shut properly. I called this company that rhymes with TEARS because that's what they'rve been causing me, dammit!!

First Visit:

The repairman my husband calls The Russian Bumblefuck arrives. He shows up, checks out the situation and tells me he can surely fix it right there. He investigates, and after a few minutes, declares in order to fix whatever is broken, he will need to take the entire piece out of the wall. The catch is, of coure, he can't do this on his own. He says he's going to need to reschedule a visit and bring someone else with him.

Second Visit:

Russian Bumblefuck and his Sidekick show up around 2:00 pm and start taking apart of oven and microwave. There are pieces lying everywhere. I tell them from the get-go that I have to leave the house at 5:00, no later. In a rush, they put everything back together (Oh, how I use that term loosely) and leave a handful of screws lying around. He tells me he will come out 'first thing in the morning' to take it apart again and figure out where those screws go. You have to be kidding, right?

Sidenote: After putting the piece back into the wall, suddenly, the latch problem is better. It still isn't lining up perfectly, but I think, "You know, at least we can use it until he gets back". I put in something and hit 30 seconds. And what happens? NOTHING. It won't heat a DAMN THING. So now, I have a NEW PROBLEM. He busted something and now my heating element won't work.




Third Visit:

I use VISIT loosely, because he didn't show up. I waited all morning for the Bumblefuck Duo to come to my house and nothing. I called the company, and the very sweet woman on the other end of the phone tells me that I'm not scheduled for today, but he'd put me on for a WEEK from Monday for a visit.

WHAT THE FUCK?

Sometime around here, HDHusband gets involved, calls, and says next Monday won't work. And magically, we have a new tech coming out on that Thursday. Well, yippee skippy.

Fourth Visit:

New technician arrives. He looks at the situation, tells me although he is big and strong and could take it out on his own, he doesn't HAVE ENOUGH TIME that day. Never mind that when we called, we informed them it would be a big project, to allow time. He tells me he's going to order new pieces, and when those arrive at my house, to call him and they'll come out and fix my problem. And he leaves.

I wait around for about a week and a half on these 'parts'. When they come in, it says, "2 of 2" - so hey! We have our parts.

Fifth Visit:

They tell me in a lovely pre-recorded message that my technician will arrive yesterday between 1:30-3:30 in the afternoon. The last time I spoke to the new guy, he swore he'd plan ahead and make sure he allowed 'at least two hours' to fix this. Because I had other plans last night, we'd made sure my husband could be home and actually get this stupid situation fixed. A goddamn simple latch! That was ALL!

At 3:45, Technician calls me. The following conversation takes place:

Him: How many parts did they send to you:
Me: Two.
Him: Oh .... well ... what pieces are they?
Me: They appear to have something to do with the thermostat.
Him: Oh ... well ... I ordered some new latches too. I guess I can't come out then.
Me: Are you kidding me?
Him: No. I don't know why it wasn't ordered ... um ... I mean, they must have taken it off the order ... so ... um ... best I can do is 'emergency order' these parts and they'll hopefully be in in the next two days, and we can come back out and get this taken care of!

Me: I waited all day for something you could have looked up on the ticket and known hours ago?

So, folks, the bottom line is this:

I'm paying for ONE service visit, and the latch problem. I won't be paying for the heating problem, or any of those other supposed visits to my house. And once this problem is fixed (please god, someday?), I will give the number of the company to my husband, and let him go to town.

To be continued, unfortunately ...

Um. So. I'm looking at the receipt of the order Second Technician made on parts. I see ONLY orders for thermostats, NOTHING ABOUT LATCHES. He didn't order them. He totally lied to me. That's it, this is WAR