My second cousin and her family stayed with us the other night before heading to the airport. One of my earliest memories is of her. She was graduating from high school when I was a little girl. I wanted her long hair and her ticket out of town. She went on to do photo journalism and has had an incredible career working for NBC and ABC, and then PBS years later.

I love talking with her. I love that I got my ticket out of town, too, and now we can sit and talk about life and our shared experiences.

Her brother died in a tragic car accident her first year in college. My dad and mom volunteered to drive up and break the news to her, so she wouldn't have to be alone when she heard what happened. Years later, my dad died my first year in college. Another aunt and uncle drove up so I wouldn't be alone when I heard the news.

But this cousin stepped up ... she listened to me when I cried and needed my dad. She offered me a place to stay over Spring Break that year. While all of my friends were going to Mexico and Florida and drinking, I went to Kansas City, MO so I could be with someone who remembered my dad. I had the best time. I worked at the television station with her.

Months later, she invited me to go with her on a photo shoot in western Colorado. We went to a wild horse ranch. We interviewed a family who lived so far out in the middle of nowhere, you had to take the shiftiest road that went along a mountain. If you looked over the edge, it dropped thousands of feet. Completely sketchy. Once there, we learned they didn't use running water, had a small little cabin and a pot-pellied pig named Daisy that met you at the front gate.

I loved this time. I needed this time. And she was so generous to give this to me.

The other night, we started talking about my dad, her mom (who died a year after my dad, and whom I loved like another grandmother), and the way life all sort of pans out as it should.

I learned so much from her about death and grieving, living your own life and making your own way.

And now, I have someone who calls me after losing her dad this past year. She calls me crying and says she is confused. I told my cousin this past year that I try and think back to when I was in this place, and how kind and loving my cousin was to me.

And I hope I can be that way to my friend.

Song In My Head: STEADY ON - Shawn Colvin